Strange Fruit @ The Eye on Malaysia

Last weekend, I had the rare chance to watch this really one-of-a-kind dance performance held in Tasik Titiwangsa where the huge ass ferris wheel more widely known as Eye On Malaysia is held. This team from Australia gave such an interesting performance. They entitled the show "Strange Fruit" for some strange reasons. I dunno why. Hmm. But the best part about the show is what know.....its FREE!!! Mak suker mak suker!! YEah, its held in open air and everyone can tengok free engkau. You never go you lugis you knows.


They actually climbed up on bendy stilts and danced right on top; making it appear as if they were really flying. The performance was further enhanced with great lightings and very interesting costumes. All in white no less.

So the show started with all 6 dancers hiding in a huge huge huge white lantern thingy and they actually make the lanterns move in unison sequences. Combined with strong lightings, the effects were simply breathtaking as it kept on changing colours. Mak suker lah nyah!!

Isn't it super gorgeous? I snapped at least a million pictures i swear. Then soon enough, the dancers slowly popped out from the lantern one by one. And by some strange coincidence, i happen to be standing in front of a pondan gagah dancer. Look at him trying to be Thumbelina.

Mak Keyyyyyysaah tau!!!

However, i do have to give him credits for putting up such a great show. He's got really good balancing skills i tell you.

At the height of the show, we see all the dancers strutting their stuff in full force, dancing gayly looking all white against the dark sky. Makes me feel like Tinkerbell myself. I just can't tell you enough how pretty it looked!

Oh and after the show, there was this heck-what-do-you-call-it water and light show on the lake as well. Its those kind of things where they spray a fan of water in the middle of the lake and they project nice lightings and even pictures at the water. Its really quite interesting to see too.

Quite a view huh? And if you look at the following pic below, you can actually see a picture of a mountain in the spray of water there.

Everyone was so mesmerized by the sight of it. You can see huge crowd by the lakeside everywhere enjoying the whole show. Look at how fascinated Mama Diva was; shamelessly striking the Little Mermaid Statue pose; tengah berangan kat Anstredam lah tu.

Same not same not?? Kurang tetek ngan wig jer...

All in all, it really was a wonderful night of seeing colourful balls, witnessing huge ejaculations in the middle of the lake, watching people selling overpriced ice creams and pop corns and oh...lets not forget about those couples hiding behind the bushes in the middle of the night.

MAK SUUUUKKERR LAH NYAH!!!

Movie Review: Duyung

Nope.

Not gonna happen.

Didn't catch it.

Why?

Coz i was tricked by Dan. Once again. Oh and he brought along another accomplice this time. Sapa tu? Why its none other than the infamous (?) Adrien....who claims that he blogs. I think blogging culture is becoming like Airasia kan. "Now Everbody Can Blog". Hmm.

See what happen was that they conveniently called me during my dinner last night and conveniently told me that they already conveniently bought tickets to a movie for me already and i have to conveniently meet them by 10pm. Best part is i don't even know what movie i'm about to watch.

So cibai lor right? I mean what if i'm not free or like i have a reeeeally important appoinment kan. Ok fuck it, who am i kidding.

And when i finally reach, naturally the 1st thing i did was to ask what movie are we watching lah right. Then only i said hi. And to my greatest horror, they pointed their paws at this:

What in gay hell.....I was so prepared to run home. I even threatened Adrien that i won't pay him my ticket money unless the movie is good. Memang keji tahap cipan, nyah! But thankfully, the movie turned out to be this isntead:

Well, ANYTHING'S better than Duyung right? Quite a good movie to catch ya'll. Kinda short though. 1.5 hours only. Inclusive of trailers and ads. Its like watching Pixar animation.

But still. I suppose the most impportant thing is getting chances to meet new friends lah kan. Friends are very important people in our lives and we should treasure our friends.

So yeah, it was really nice meeting you, what's-your-name-again?? Ha ha ha ha....kidding. Surely Adrien tengah cakar cakar monitor tarik rambut now.

Chill sistah :D

Oh, and Happy Valentines to ya'll love birds there.

Barbie Galore in One Utama

On the week before Chinese New Year, (oh, Happy Chinese New Year to you all by the way) I was doing my regular snooping at all the display windows in One Utama. This time round, I saw the bestest thing ever. There’s this wedding package promotion going on and those oh-so-smart wedding people actually displayed samples of their wedding dresses not in pictures or albums…..but in dolls!!

Screw Barbie, man. All the dolls were vogueness and there were rows and rows and rows of them. I circled the displays at least 10 times (if not, more) and I couldn’t even blink once. I’m telling you, nothing comes between me and dolls. NOTHING.

I don’t care if I’m the only male(?) adult crowding amongst the throng of 7 year old girls dressed in shocking pink Barbie apparels from head to toe.

I don’t care if passing shoppers gave me weird stares while I was intensely snapping pictures of all the dolls like as if it were as hot as those Edison Chen scandal pics.

I don’t care if the promoters watched me circling the displays over and again like a hungry vulture ready to strike its dying prey. I had this evil plan of clobbering the innocent promoter to death and running away with ALL the dolls. Too bad I dun have a wheelbarrow or something to ferry all the dolls…..I would look kinda silly running around One Utama with a wheelbarrow of dolls too. But who gives a hoot!

I mean look at all these beauties…how can anyone just walk by without even looking at least!


They are so frilly!

So colourful!

So flowery!

So lacy!

So bling bling!!

So……DIVA!!!!

Oh my god if I owned this collection, I would quit my job immediately and finish my remaining lifetime playing with each and everyone of it! I’ll name all of them and I’ll build a huge ass doll mansion so they can all live together and have a catfight drama everyday…..just like American Top Model kan?

They’re gonna have an old fashioned English Tea Party eating plastic scones and cookies from little Bone China, lavish Balls every night, summer party by the pool, beauty pageants…..oh I’ve planned it all!!

I SO want them dolls…..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kelantan Launches It's First Starbucks

Anybody up for air moka ais kurang manis?

Shedding Blood In Dewan Filharmonik Petronas

No there weren't any riots going on there. I paid a visit to DFP last thursday to watch a dance drama. I always go there to watch concerts only and i also had the chance to perform there once. Hik. Yeah it was a really great honour. But I've yet to watch a dance drama there so of course i was very excited.

The show for the night was entitled Raja Bersiong (which simply means "The Fanged Sultan" yeah, something like a male pontianak with royal blood. So diva.) This Raja Bersiong is actually a traditional Malay folklore.





In a nutshell, its about a palace maid who accidentally cut her finger while preparing a dish for the Sultan and her blood accidentally dripped into the dish. But the stupid maid still served the Sultan the dish anyway; and for some weird reasons, he actually tasted the blood and became addicted to it. Pfffttt. How can anyone get addicted to blood. I've tasted it myself before. Not that nice also. Can't the Sultan be addicted to nicer things?! Folklores are so stoopid sometimes.

So anyway, the Sultan then commanded the maid to drip blood into all his dishes. His cravings for blood got stronger until he started killing people to drink their blood and soon enough he grew fangs (oooh....SO SCARY!! I'm shivering in fear as i'm typing now. Pffttt); hence the unglamorous name Raja Bersiong. See the Raja Bersiong actor...so horror, padan the character.

So back to the show. As soon as i stepped into the hall, i was rather dissapointed to see the dull looking set. Whole damn thing was just symetrical patterns of brownish grey in colour. I've desigend better sets for my school production lor seriously. Only later i came to find out from friends saying that their set is memang those style all along one.



Thankfully, the performance made it all up to compensate the horror looking set. I was really blown away by the impressive soundtrack and the best part of the show has to be their superb choreography. The steps were an intricate blend of traditional and contemporary steps. The results? Fabulousness!! The steps were very creative and all the dancers were spot on. Hardly any visible mistakes and the main casts did a fantastic job as well. Tu lah power pondan katanyer. Fonen Fonens are natural dancers you know.

So am i going to support their next production?? DEFINATELY!! The price is also bloody reasonable lor. I got really really good seats for RM20 only. Anybody also can afford. And i think you ols should attend and expose yourselves too. To the culture and beauty of performing arts you pervert. Nobody hadap to see you naked in DFP lah. Except for you Ken Watanabe, my hemsem Mr. Chairman. I'd love to see you naked. Anywhere. Biler you nak beli Mizuagay mak??

Mak rela nyah...

The HL Milk Massacre

Lau Niang: How old are you??

Chatter: 30

Lau Niang: Wah lau!! Why you look like 18?! You botox izzit? (I'm serious...the guy look bloody young!)

Chatter: Wah...why your mouth so bad one?

Lau Niang: This is me being very polite already. Consider yourself lucky i good mood tonight. So what's your secret? Share share lah.....

Chatter: Oh i drink milk every day. That's why my skin so smooth.....

Lau Niang: Milk??? Really ah?? Milk good for skin meh? I thought good for bones only. But my bones very healthy. Everyday i get boner also....

Chatter: Ha ha h aha!! You dun believe me you try yourself lah....



So......milk is good for the skin says the lil' birdie. If drink milk can cantik....mak rela, nyah. But how....i hate milk to my guts. Don't you think milk is damn smelly? You know why baby smells? Coz they drink milk. That's why.

So i sat down and think and think and think. There must be a way that i can swallow milk. Think, lau niang think..........DING!! There's actually a brand that i can digest.

*Feels excited and runs to the nearest Kiosk*

TADAA!! Susu lemak rendah jenama HL. This milk got vanilla taste and its not smelly like other brands one. Yay.....i'm a drinking HL everyday and Lau Niang is going to be chantik like Ms World soon.

*Pours milk into a tiny cup to test test water*

Yeeech.....why the milk yellow yellow one?! Is it expired?? Is this condensed milk?? I bought wrongly ker? Since when HL got condensed milk one?

* Drinks yellow milk in 1 gulp anyway*


Dies a miserable death....poisoned.

*Checks milk carton thoroughly*

Tiu nia sing KNNCCB WTF!!!! Banana flavoured milk?! What the heck is banana milk?! And look at how they labeled the box....just printed on one tiny corner....who would have noticed?! Damn bloody misleading lor!!

What if i'm allergic to bananas?! I can die you know. Mr. HL should have printed a huge ass banana picture on the box and put a for-fear-factor-lovers-only warning on it!

Not only i was conned of my RM4.90, i nearly died of poisoning some more. So horror okeh. Cis cis cis....never ever buy anything with banana in it. Bananas are meant to be sucked eaten raw!

so umm......i have 3/4 box of banana milk left.....anyone interested???

Perhaps Love (?)

Hello u ols.......sorry i was late a few mins for my current post. Lau Niang so busy lately. You know, with all the festive seasons on and off all the time, shopping can be a very daunting task you know. Kerja Mak shopppppping jer....no time to eat even. I is busy woman on the run gitue.

So this would my 1st post for the year 2008. Nice nice. I think most of everyone should have a "Happy New Year" post on 1st Jan then they would go what's-my-resolution and what not; all those stuff......so boring kan. Opps. No offence there.

On the contrary, i'd like to take one last look back at year 2007 as it was a rather dramatic year for me. I mean of course everyday is full of drama for me lah, but 2007 has been extra drama for me because so many drama took place last year and i kena so many drama and i know you fully understand exactly what i mean so i know you won't ask any further questions and just keep on reading thankyouverymuch.

Last year, the biggest slap to me has to be my break-up with my ex. For you new readers out there, it has been more or less of a year since my last relationship that lasted 3 beautiful years. It really was beautiful while it lasted but i suppose all good things eventually comes to an end....to me at least. As much as we sometimes hope that relationships will last forever, sometimes....shit happens. And you can't shove it back up your arse anymore once its out. Yeah you get the gist.

I know....i've been raking this up every now and then. Truth is, i could never really let go of him. It's not easy for me to fall for someone.....and its 10 times harder for me to let go of someone. Perhaps it's a sagitarian thing. I'll never know for sure. There's not a day that passes without me thinking of him somehow or rather. But at least, it no longer hurts as much. That's my only comfort.

But sometimes, the big guy up there works in really mysterious ways. I loose a lover, i gained more friends. Besides my divine sisterhood who stood by me through thick and thin (God bless them) I somehow had the previledge to meet many other fellow bloggers who eventually ends up with us being best buddies. Or should i say many other bloggers had the previldege to meet me in person. More diva that way kan.

You know, we bloggers are really nice people. I've yet to meet up a nasty blogger in person; like those nutcases from the gay chatrooms and profile websites who can only think of humping and more humping tau. Opps terlepas secret scandals plak.

So yeah, i got to know many nice people out there through blogging. Who says blogging is a waste of time....mak apom kau baru tau. There's just too many names to list down here and i dun wanna be a bastard to leave out a single name. I know i would be pissed if people left me out. But hor, bloggers here very forgiving one also you know. Sometimes i meet meet bloggers and i dun even know who they are....and then i go "Hey how you know me ah??" So blonde kan. Happens all the time......but u ols out there wont keysah so much kan. Ha ha ha ha!

The year 2008 definitely promises a lot of new challenges. I now have to teach a new subject. My 1st lesson is in 2 hours time and i dun have a single clue of what to teach. I'm supposed to be researching my lesson and here i am ranting. Mampos mak.

Also, i have decided to further my studies and pursue a masters. To add more shit, my beloved lecturers have recommended my name to the university senate to pursue a full research proggrame instead of doing courseworks which is relatively easier.

There's also a few huge ass mega projects coming up in which i will reveal when the right time comes. With so many things at hand, i definitely have to upgrade my balls to make sure i don't die standing....ball-less. Sure its a lot of work, but i'm actually excited to be trying so many new things. I just hope i won't screw up so much.

Along the way this year, i hope i will continue to make more nice friends and who knows....perhaps find new love.

So here's to everyone....Happy Fucking New Year!!



Dah.....mak kena prepare lesson now.

Jangan kacau.