Phantom Vs. Butch 2

So here's the real coverage. Last weekend, my beloved aunt treated me to an all expense paid trip to watch Phantom of The Opera held in the prestigious Esplanade in Singapore. Of course mak pun happy lah, feeling feeling like win Kit Kat have a break contest grand prize gitu…..

Thank God this Durian isn't smelly....

Inside the Durian...

Anyway, this would be my very 1st trip to the Esplanade. All this while the Singapore Gomen propah propah how grand the place I never had a chance to visit the place also. And this would ALSO be the 1st time (probably the only chance i'll have as well) I’m watching Phantom of The Opera. I never thought I’d ever had a chance like this….so you can imagine all the excitement in me spilling out.



So as soon as I reached the venue, I had a rather good impression of the whole area. It seems like the gomen there really promote visual and performing arts in order to reach out to their society. I had to walk a rather long pathway to reach the hall itself and along the way, I was treated to the most peculiar sight. People were allowed to scribble graffiti and ‘artsy’ pictures on the wall….so yeah there were lots of funny looking paitings drawn to the wall.

Singaporean’s definition of art…

Ok lah...kira special lah....hmm....mak no comment lah...must respect people's culture kan...

Oh and also, there were this huge underground lobby where perasan attention whores can do anything and perform their syok sendiri show there. Then people would just stand there and watch. While I was there I saw people doing BMX stunts and apparently….erm…they have their ghetto societies there also, (I thought only Bangsar got…larrrikk!) siap with the boom box and all. I saw got many Snoop Dawg, Akon, Queen Latifah, Justin Timberlake, 50 cent, 20 cent, mama ghetto….wannabes.

Upon reaching the main venue, I was greeted by this huge ass Phantom banner. It’s all over the place I’m telling you….mak lagi excited lah tuh..!

I watching Phantom...mak glamour!



As soon as I entered the hall, I flipped out my sleek camera and started snapping furiously. Snap here snap there….until tiba-tiba got…

“S’cuse me sir, you are not allowed to snap pictures in the hall…”

“Oh ok…so sorry about that…”

The usher left with a satisfied face. Snapsnapsnapsnapsnapsnapsnapsnap….ahh..kisah apa aku…

The view from my seat.

Then the hall darkened….the overture started, and the chandelier came to life. (To those who have no idea what this scene is like, it’s supposed to be grand giler babs. Go watch the movie k? Then you’ll know what I mean) The magnificent chandelier was slowly raised and lit up and the overture played on…a jaw dropping sight I tell you.

See what I mean?

I was so stunned gawking at the chandelier I dinch even realized my hand was slowly raising when suddenly….

FLASH!!!!!!!!!!

Matilah mak…!!!!!!!! Everyone staring. Mak malu habis tahap cipan tenuk tau!! The whole hall was in pitch black then sudden sudden my camera tak off flash plak….VERY kesial tau! So what some more…I faster faster off the flash lah. And I sat very still of course.

Then the curtain opened…..wah the scene is so elaborate and nice….snap snap snap. Wah Carlotta is singing…snap snap snap. Wah the elephant come out…snap snap snap.

Class, this is what we call *snapping with confidence…

But that flash…ugh…that farking flash!! I know I’m so busted….come intermission time mak dah panic giler dah. I just want to bury myself under the seat. Or peel off someone’s face and stick it on my own (ala-ala Dr. Hannibal Lector)

As I sat very still on my seat, my eyes were checking furiously for unhappy ushers and my heart was beating faster than Mama Diva’s mouth masa tengah maki hamun. Larrriik!! True enough….i saw got this Butch coming my direction. Butch tau!!! The short hair with thick black frames and muscle muscle type one. Bad enough I have a phobia on butches…they must send one after my ass. Terus I kena…

Butch: Scuse me sir, have you been taking pictures during the performance? Can I have a look at your recoding device?

I fished out my camera phone…

Butch: Can I have a look at the picture album?

So I pun open album, scrolled for her. Lucky i saved all my porn pics to laptop already. If not buat malu only; as if not malu enough...anyway I took a few snappies with my cam phone also, so I deleted in front of her to please her lor….

Butch: Do you have any other recording devices?

Me: Err….no.

Butch: Please do not take anymore pictures. We have very strict regulations about photo taking in this hall.

Me: It won’t happen again…

Butch: Have a good evening…

And she moves away. Finally……S-U-C-K-E-R!!!

Nasib my camera is salvaged. The next half of the show was adrenalin pumping. Not because the show very exciting; but because my aunt knew what were the staff capable of. She was whispering to my sister that there might do a body check after the show even. Eeeps!!!!!!!!!

So the second half of the show, mak feeling feeling macam Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible. We were busy passing the camera around under the seat…all the way to my uncle’s hand (3 seats away) and he had to hide it in his pants. After the show he had to leave using another exit and meet us somewhere else.

Again my blood was rushing up and down….i turned blue for a minute and purple the next. I was praying to God for the mercy of my dear life. I promised I’ll attend Mass more regularly. I promised I'd stop drooling at guys (for a while lah). And by the grace of God, my life was spared. No body checks. Although i was hoping that a buff cop in uniform would take me to a room and strip search me...

That was fucking scary ok. I kid you not. But after the whole ordeal, it all seemed so funny and I actually laughed at myself even.

So here are the surviving snappies. Go indulge yourself and you better be thanking my ass after this. The things I’d go through for the love of blogging…..

*Do not attempt this on your own. All stunts have been performed by trained confident teacher.