Ooops I Did It Again.....

I am now sitting in Old Town cafe...slapping myself for being such a nice and compromising although very cute and adorable girl. You see....i got myself into a pickle.....again. In a matter of few hours, i'm about to meet up a psychotic chatter.

What happened? What was i thinking? Who is that psycho??



It all started like this. This guy has been existing silently in my MSN contact list for quite a while. Really, i dun even remember where i know him. And then suddenly out of the blue, he messages me. I clearly remember our 1st conversation.


Chatter: Hi.....how are you ah? So long we never meet up already.


Me: Err......hi i'm doing great but i believe we've never met before.


Chatter: Wah....you forgotten me already ah? Last time we had a threesome before lah. Are you still in touch with the other guy? Wanna meet up again?


What-the-fuck-kanine-cau-cibai-hello-and-good-evening. The only time you'll catch me doing a threesome is when Ken Watanabe and Lee Hom is coincidentally in KL and coincidetally in my house okeh.

Are you Ken Wanatabe? No.


Are you Lee Hom? No.


Then if all no how to have threesome like that!? So back to the conversation.


Me: Errr.....i think you must have gotten the wrong person. I seriously never met up with you before...let alone have any threesomes.


Chatter: Oh really ah.....must be the wrong person then. So malu. Ha ha ha....


But anyway, he kinda admitted that he found me attractive and he went all out to impress me. For the past month or so, he never failed to sms or call me everyday. I mean sure, i like to be treated like Queen Amidala. I like the attention he's giving me. But its so overwhelming sometimes. Up to an irritating level in fact. Now you say i fussy kan. People dun sms you, you complain. People sms you, you also complain. In my defence, that's what divas do. Ok lah, i give you a sample of our sms conversation then you tell me if i'm being diva or not.


Abg 3some: What you doing now ah boy?


Me: Having dinner with frens lor.


Abg 3some: Wahh.....who are they wor? You meet plu ah?


Me: Aiyah, they're just my friends from the orchestra lah. You think i have time to meet up guys ah??


Abg 3some: I worry you mah. Heh heh. How many of them wor?



Me: Umm...5



Abg 3some: Can mms me their pics?



Me: *no reply*



Psycho not you tell me??! Want to find out who am i hanging out with, how many of them, and even want me to MMS pics of my friends to me. That is not concern or worry okeh. That is being obsessive oledi you know.

Yahh needdd....to let a sistah have her free space.

Yahh needdd....to let a sistah have her own personal time.

You think i being diva now??? Waste my credit answering all those soalan yang tak perlu okeh. Somehow i know he is not the right guy for me.



I tell you something personal bout me. I rarely fall for guys one and when i do, i feel it immediately one. If i have feelings for a guy, my heart woud skip a beat whenever i recieve an SMS from him. With abg 3some, i would roll my eyes and go "ughh....what does he wants now..."



And then hor, my heart would be running like Black Beauty if i am to meet him for the 1st time. I'd be scared and worried. I be twirling my pigtails and go "....ohmygod...what if he dun like me in person? What if i'm not his type? Do i look ok now?"



And when we meet up....he would grab my waist and draw me near....stare intensely into my eyes with looks that says "Let me take care of you forever..." My heart would then be choking in my throat and i have to swallow it back in. Then he would draw my head closer to him and he would give me a gentle peck on my forehead....assuring his love for me.

You see how well Ken Watanabe does it???

As he kisses my forehead gently, i would feel his big strong hands on my cheeks. I close my eyes, the mer-people would rise from the oceans and start singing the ending theme of Little Mermaid. You know the one that goes "Now you can waaallk *chang* (the grand cymbal).....now you can ruunnnn *chang* (grand cymbal again) ....now you can staaay all day in the sun...(choir sing aahh ahh ahhh....)...just you and me.....(aahhhhh) and i could bee.... (AAHHH! *high pitch mah*) part of your worrlldd....




And then a giant wave would lift King Triton up, he would hold my hands approvingly and touch me with his trident and then my shirt will turn into a sparkly Dior dress....then he'll wave at the skies making a huge rainbow. I'd sail away under the rainbow and all the mer-folks will be waving bye bye to me.


My god....i'm such a Phoebe Buffay.


But you see.....i'm about to meet him soon but i'm not the least scared or excited and what's worse...the merfolks are not singing! How to make lau niang happy if no mermaid singing?!


Definitely not the right guy lor. If its the right guy i know the merfolks will sing and wave bye bye to me one. No merpeople means not right guy.


No merpeople now. So sad. Sigh....i'm so dreading this. Wish me luck people......